From: mdhangton@gmail.com

On Sunday, August 31, 2014 9:03:10 PM UTC-4, Kevin C wrote:

> 
> First, I failed to establish setting or genre in the first sentences. 

Do you believe that you need to introduce Christ in the first sentence for the
story to be immediately recognizable as Christian SF?
I think that it is better to show SF elements soon, because that is what SF
readers are there to see.  Still, sometimes I set out to write manuscripts
where that isn't always possible.

>Second, I failed to establish exactly who the protagonist and his men were. 

Some editorial people say that they want to see the POV character's gender,
rough age, station and importance in society in the first paragraph.  If the
reader goes on very long and is still guessing about what's going on in the
story, then I think it 
becomes problematic.

>Third, I introduced six or seven named characters in two paragraphs. 

It sounds like that could be a lot to handle, but I haven't seen the ms.

I have read books with titles like

Hooked

Thanks, But This Isn't For Us

77 Reasons Why Your Manuscript Was Rejected

They are entirely oriented toward making it past the first reader, then the
editor.  The idea is that if you put everything into a manuscript that they
tell you to, your first sentence, then first paragraph, then first page will
be so psychologically 
irresistible to the editorial and sales staff, that it fly through the
publication process.  You can read them, and maybe feel somewhat more in
control of how your writing is received by these people.  But you gotta
wonder, if these guys know the magic 
formula for success, then why are they writing How To books.

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