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|    MINISTER    |    Not sure, possibly Christian related    |    2,922 messages    |
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|    Message 1,230 of 2,922    |
|    Daryl Stout to All    |
|    [GCFL.net] Church Signs    |
|    23 Jul 16 21:53:00    |
       * Originally in: Clean Joke        * Originally on: 07-23-16 09:31        * Originally by: Robert E Starr JR               1. "No God - No Peace? Know God - Know Peace."              2. "Free Trip to heaven. Details Inside!"              3. "Try our Sundays. They are better than Baskin-Robbins."              4. "Searching for a new look? Have your faith lifted here!"              5. An ad for one Church has a picture of two hands holding stone tablets on       which the Ten Commandments are inscribed and a headline that reads: "For fast,       fast, fast relief, take two tablets."              6. When the restaurant next to another Church put out a sign with big red       letters that said, "Open Sundays," the church reciprocated with its own       message: "We are open on Sundays, too."              7. "People are like tea bags - you have to put them in hot water before you       know how strong they are."              8. "Fight truth decay - study the Bible daily."              9. "How will you spend eternity - Smoking or Non-smoking?"              10. "Dusty Bibles lead to Dirty Lives"              11. "Come work for the Lord. The work is hard, the hours are long and the pay       is low. But the retirement benefits are out of this world."              12. "It is unlikely there'll be a reduction in the wages of sin."              13. "Do not wait for the hearse to take you to church."              14. "If you're headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns."              15. "If you don't like the way you were born, try being born again."              16. "Looking at the way some people live, they ought to obtain eternal fire       insurance soon."              17. "This is a ch_ _ ch. What is missing?" ----- (U R)              18. "In the dark? Follow the Son."              19. "Running low on faith? Step in for a fill-up."              20. "If you can't sleep, don't count sheep. Talk to the Shepherd."              21. There was a church that had problems with outsiders parking in its parking       lots, so they put up a sign: CHURCH CAR PARKING - FOR MEMBERS ONLY, TRESPASSERS       WILL BE BAPTIZED! That took care of the problem!              Received from FranCMT2.              --       Rate, print or email this funny at       http://www.gcfl.net/archive.php?funny=20160721              http://GCFL.net - The Good, Clean Funnies List       A cheerful heart is good medicine... (Prov 17:22a)       Facebook: http://facebook.com/gcfl.net       Twitter: http://twitter.com/gcfl       Mail address: GCFL, Box 100, Harvest, AL 35749, USA              Go to http://gcfl.net/mlfrontend.php to change your subscription options or       unsubscribe.                       ===               Rob Starr       Lord Time SysOp of       Time Warp of the Future BBS        Telnet://Time.Darktech.Org:24 or       Telnet://Time.Synchro.Net:24 (qwk or ftn & e-mail)       ICQ # 11868133 or # 70398519 Jabber : lordtime2000@gmail.com       Yahoo : lordtime2000 AIM : LordTime20000 Astra : lord_time        X-Box : Lord Time 2000 oovoo : lordtime2000        # Origin: Time Warp of the Future BBS - Home of League 10 (316:77/1)       [0m---        þ [32mSynchronet[0m þ Stepping Stone BBS -- telnet://vintagebbsing.com:23       --- SBBSecho 3.00-Win32        * Origin: The Thunderbolt BBS - wx1der.dyndns.org (1:19/33)    |
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