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   MINISTER      Not sure, possibly Christian related      2,922 messages   

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   Message 1,230 of 2,922   
   Daryl Stout to All   
   [GCFL.net] Church Signs   
   23 Jul 16 21:53:00   
   
    * Originally in: Clean Joke   
    * Originally on: 07-23-16 09:31   
    * Originally by: Robert E Starr JR   
      
    1. "No God - No Peace? Know God - Know Peace."   
      
   2. "Free Trip to heaven. Details Inside!"   
      
   3. "Try our Sundays. They are better than Baskin-Robbins."   
      
   4. "Searching for a new look? Have your faith lifted here!"   
      
   5. An ad for one Church has a picture of two hands holding stone tablets on   
   which the Ten Commandments are inscribed and a headline that reads: "For fast,   
   fast, fast relief, take two tablets."   
      
   6. When the restaurant next to another Church put out a sign with big red   
   letters that said, "Open Sundays," the church reciprocated with its own   
   message: "We are open on Sundays, too."   
      
   7. "People are like tea bags - you have to put them in hot water before you   
   know how strong they are."   
      
   8. "Fight truth decay - study the Bible daily."   
      
   9. "How will you spend eternity - Smoking or Non-smoking?"   
      
   10. "Dusty Bibles lead to Dirty Lives"   
      
   11. "Come work for the Lord. The work is hard, the hours are long and the pay   
   is low. But the retirement benefits are out of this world."   
      
   12. "It is unlikely there'll be a reduction in the wages of sin."   
      
   13. "Do not wait for the hearse to take you to church."   
      
   14. "If you're headed in the wrong direction, God allows U-turns."   
      
   15. "If you don't like the way you were born, try being born again."   
      
   16. "Looking at the way some people live, they ought to obtain eternal fire   
   insurance soon."   
      
   17. "This is a ch_ _ ch. What is missing?" ----- (U R)   
      
   18. "In the dark? Follow the Son."   
      
   19. "Running low on faith? Step in for a fill-up."   
      
   20. "If you can't sleep, don't count sheep. Talk to the Shepherd."   
      
   21. There was a church that had problems with outsiders parking in its parking   
   lots, so they put up a sign: CHURCH CAR PARKING - FOR MEMBERS ONLY, TRESPASSERS   
   WILL BE BAPTIZED! That took care of the problem!   
      
   Received from FranCMT2.   
      
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