Hi, Michael!  Awhile ago you wrote in a message to Ardith Hinton:   
      
    AH>  You may have seen jokes elsewhere of a type I'd describe   
    AH>  as "gallows humour" from senior citizens about how, if   
    AH>  one didn't say   
      
    MD>  What is gallows here? Is it vicious, perverse, wicked or   
    MD>  is it a gibbet, derrick?   
      
      
             Literally, "gallows" is synonymous with "gibbet"... a structure   
   where people are "hanged by the neck until dead".  A "derrick", AKA a "crane"   
   in this part of the world, is used for lifting heavy (non-human) physical   
   objects.   
      
             The term "gallows humour" is a metaphor.  It refers to a satirical   
   or ironic commentary about matters which are/were frightening or painful for   
   those directly involved.  I guess one could call it "perverse" in the sense   
   that it's a deliberate & often rather mischievous departure from convention.   
      
      
      
    AH>  "Miss Stickler, may I please go to the lavatory?" one would   
    AH>  be completely ignored or be forced to sit through a lecture   
      
    MD>  Hm-m-m... For me it is a strange joke, it is not funny at all.   
      
      
             Not to worry!  AFAIC you've identified another distinguishing feature   
   ... very few people find this sort of joke amusing unless they've had a   
   similar experience.  It's not funny when you're in grade one or two & the   
   teacher has a polysyllabic British name you've never heard before & s/he   
   expects you to speak in a dialect nobody else around you uses.  I think there   
   are folks here who can probably relate because their parents... like mine...   
   came from SomePlace Else. When the wounds aren't so fresh, one sees from a   
   different perspective....  :-)   
      
      
      
    AH>  When our daughter went to the same school I noticed the sign   
    AH>  "GIRLS' LAVATORY" had been truncated to "GIRLS" [...].   
      
    MD>  I understand you mean that girls' feelings were neglected.   
      
      
             What I was thinking of was the sort of situation where one may not   
   be taught how to read words such as "lavatory" (which has never been in common   
   use around these parts during my lifetime although it may have been at the   
   time the school was built) or how to interpret various symbols.  I can't say   
   for certain what happened in the boys' basement because as females our   
   daughter & I weren't allowed to set foot there... but I reckon that when the   
   school began to include kindergarten together with many students who weren't   
   native speakers of English somebody realized it might be a good idea to update   
   the signs for both genders.   
      
             While some women may have felt neglected or ignored by formal   
   English years ago there were probably male nurses & elementary school teachers   
   who felt the same way.  The wording in the professional literature has changed   
   now... so one may see masculine & feminine pronouns used in alternate   
   chapters.  People's attitudes don't always change in response to changes in   
   the language, though... or if they do the changes tend to occur more slowly.   
      
      
      
    MD>  it prepares a young person to a real life, doesn't it? It is   
    MD>  interesting to hear what this environment manifested in?   
      
      
             In other echoes, it is often said that whatever doesn't kill us   
   makes us stronger.  I survived... I developed an "ear" for some of the fine   
   points of the language which others might miss... and eventually I began to   
   realize I was fairly proficient in English & enjoyed teaching it.  :-)   
      
      
      
    AH>  While waiters & waitresses have been replaced by servers   
    AH>  it would not be safe to assume a governess is a female   
    AH>  governor...   
      
    MD>  In Russian a governess is rather a governor's wife.   
      
      
             Ah... just as a princess might be the wife of a prince.  In English   
   a governess is a woman employed to teach other people's children at home....    
   :-)   
      
      
      
    MD>  Here the society is more conservative and we have no such   
    MD>  changes in the language yet. They are still ahead, but I   
    MD>  think such changes are inevitable.   
      
      
             Language is always growing & changing.  But in a conservative   
   society folks may be less easily persuaded to hurry things along....  :-)   
      
      
      
      
   --- timEd/386 1.10.y2k+   
    * Origin: Wits' End, Vancouver CANADA (1:153/716)