-=> Quoting Daryl Stout to Nancy Backus on 02-08-15  12:48 <=-   
      
    NB>> DAG> Sorry about the one kid thing, if you were hoping to have more.   
    NB>>Thanks.  We did try, very unsuccessfully, for a long time... it just   
    NB>>wasn't going to happen, and it turned out that having even the one   
    NB>>was a bit of a fluke, or miracle, if you will...  :)   
      
    DS> One of my cousins was in a similar situation. She and her husband   
    DS> tried for years to conceive a child; but she either miscarried, or   
    DS> never conceived. After several years, they adopted a young child...and   
    DS> shortly after that, lo and behold, she got pregnant, and now they have   
    DS> 2 kids...the adopted one, and the one conceived naturally, as it were.   
      
   We had the first right away, early even... and then no more.  But I've   
   heard of many instances where after adopting, infertile couples were   
   able to have their own natural child after all... my aunt was one of   
   those... they adopted their first, and then had two more naturally..   
      
    DS> Everyone's system is different, male and female (obviously), and   
    DS> ferility issues can happen to both sexes.   
      
   Very true.   
      
    DS> I found out the other day that another individual was in a similar   
    DS> situation that I was 35 years ago...we both contracted the chicken pox   
    DS> as adults (and not as kids), and the effects were far worse. A   
    DS> childhood disease in an adult will either sterilize them, kill them, or   
    DS> something else. I caught it from my brother, who caught it from his   
    DS> first wife's kids. He had a relatively mild case by comparison to what   
    DS> I had.    
      
   Adults do generally have worse cases than children... but many of them   
   do recover just fine without lasting effect...     
      
    DS> My case was "the worst that the doctor had ever seen". It put me in   
    DS> the hospital for a week, and out of work at the local Burger King   
    DS> (across the street from where I was attending to college), and out of   
    DS> college for 2 months, by order of the State Health Department. They   
    DS> put me in isolation, as they thought I was going into encephalitis...   
    DS> people coming to visit me had to put on protective gear, as if I was   
    DS> "radioactive"...well, I guess I could've been considered a "biohazard".    
      
   I'd guess that the isolation was a two-pronged thing... both to protect   
   you from getting anything else that would complicate things even worse,   
   and to protect others from getting infected from you.   
      
    DS> Then, after working around nasty solvents like methyl-ehtyl-ketone   
    DS> for nearly 20 years, that about sealed the deal with a very low sperm   
    DS> count, and I was concerned that it could also lead to deformities. So,   
    DS> I "had my wings clipped" before I got married...and as my late wife,   
    DS> Janice, noted "they wouldn't spay me, so he volunteered to get   
    DS> neutered". :P    
      
   She did have quite the sense of humor, didn't she... :)  You might not   
   have had any real problems if you'd had kids, but I can see not wanting   
   to take that chance, given the circumstances... :)   
      
    DS> But, the way the world is nowadays...along with the disobedient and   
    DS> insolent nature of so many kids...I'm glad I'll never be able to   
    DS> father a child. Indeed, the resident manager at the apartment complex   
    DS> where I live said "You are so lucky you don't have kids"...apparently   
    DS> hers are "a terror".   
      
   I'd guess she let them get out of hand earlier... Most kids I know well   
   are reasonably well-behaved... but then their parents have done what   
   they could to make that be the case, from early on...  :)   
      
    DS> The ONE EXCEPTION I saw to kids behavior is with the Duggar family   
    DS> (Jim Bob, and his wife Michelle). They have had at least 19 kids, and   
    DS> now have grandchildren. When he goes impotent, or she goes into   
    DS> menopause, she is going to be a basket case!! But, from what I've   
    DS> seen, all of their children are VERY WELL BEHAVED...and that's more the   
    DS> exception than the rule nowadays. They properly discipline their kids,   
    DS> and that's probably why the kids are so "good".   
      
   Discipline and teaching are important... and learning to take on   
   responsibility at a young age...  :)   
      
    DS> I got my share of spankings growing up, and I don't consider myself   
    DS> mal-adjusted. And, this talk of "you can't spank your kids, as it'll   
    DS> ruin their self esteem", is garbage...pure and simple.   
      
   There is, of course, an often thin line between spanking and abuse...   
   and some parents do cross over that...  but it's just as abusive and   
   neglectful in the long run to allow a child to have his/her own way   
   without any discipline... a well-planted swat goes a long way...  :)   
      
   ttyl        neb   
      
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