CLUES FOR LES MANLEY IN SEARCH FOR THE KING 
 
NEW YORK CITY 
Problem: The door to the equipment room outside Les' office is locked. 
How do I get in? 
1. What do you usually use to unlock a door? 
2. You'll need a door-unlocking device. Let's call it a key. 
3. Go down the hall into Mr. Burnbaum's office 
4. Look at his desk 
 
Problem: Everytime I try to leave Mr. Burnbaum's office with the master 
key, I fall to a grisly shrieking death. How can I avoid this? 
1. Restart, then look at the calendar in Les' office. 
2. More is in order for Les. -Make demands. 
3. Ask Mr. Burnbaum about remunerative compensation. 
4. Come on, Les. Ask for a raise. 
5. Take the keys from Mr. Burnbaum's desk while he's distracted by 
certain corporate "ASSets." 
 
Problem: There appears to be something like an anti tank fortification 
betweenLes and the counter in the Bus Depot. 
1. Look at the railings. 
2. Ask the mother about the bus. It might save you some trouble. 
3. There must be some other way out of town. 
 
Problem: I can't get past the shrew in the apartment building on the 
NY Streets. Is Les just too virile and intimidating? 
1. (insert laughter here) 
2. Look, New Yourkers are rude and suspicios .. unless you convince them 
they'll be qouted in major media outlets. 
3. Did you grab everything you could from the WILL equipment room? 
4. Show the reporter's ID. 
 
Problem: I think I need to get my hands on Bobbi's soft prize. But I'm  
not getting anywhere. 
1. OK you're nervous. Start slow. Ask about the weather. 
2. Look at the table. 
3. Aren't you thirsty, Les? 
4. Wouldn't you like to sit down, Les? 
5. Now that you're cozy on the couch, Ask Bobbi to show you the scarf. 
6. OK, Bobbi's soft prize is within reach. Simple Manley logic dictates 
that you must now get it wet. (Any available lubricant will do) 
7. Spill your soda. 
 
Problem: Hey! Where the heck did the scarf go? 
1. Walk around to look for it Les. 
2. Look at that clothesline east of Bobbi's building. 
3. "Gosh. What verb should I use to direct myself to negotiate the fence 
that stands between me and the scarf?" (This one's not too tough, Les.) 
 
Problem: Gee, what a circus. It's really fun and entertaining to walk 
around and be ignored. 
1. Have you really "looked" at anything yet? 
2. Col. Bob likes paying customers, Les. But since they're sold out, 
it look like you'll have to work for admission. 
3. Find Colonel Bob's trailer 
4. Walk through the parking lot at hte far left of the circus. 
5. Ask Bob for a job 
6. Go south towards the elephants. 
7. Take the shovel. 
8. After finishig, go back and ask Bob for a ticket. 
 
Problem: OK, maybe it is the best job I've ever had - fresh air, 
good exercise, plus all I can eat. But I need to find the King!  
How do I get away from these elephants? 
1. Try dropping the shovel Les. 
 
Problem: I earned my ticket. Now what? 
1. Walk to various areas/exhibits and "LOOK." 
 
Problem: As I write this, various hunks of my body are slowly dissolving in pepsin and other digestive acids commonly found in a lion's stomach. I guess 
I've had better afternoons. Is there some way I can avoid being ripped into sirloin? 
1. Feed something else to the lion. 
2. Remember: Circus animals like circus food. 
3. Take popcorn from the popcorn stand. 
4. Feed the popcorn to the lion. 
5. Well. Maybe it's better to just drop the popcorn. 
 
Problem: The daredevil, Fred von Leep, seems reluctant to anuthing. 
What's the delay? 
1. Look at the assistant, Alona. 
2. Ask Alona about Fred. 
3. Look at the ladder. 
4. Look at the rungs. 
5. Feel the rungs. 
6. Give Fred something to help his grip. (They don't call you the  
gripmaster for nothing, Les.) 
7. Find the Strongman 
 
Problem: The Strongman is suffering from terminal squat. How can I 
motivate hin off his haunches? 
1. Talk to Luigi. 
2. Look at hte sign. 
3. Look at the difference. 
4. Look at Luigi's muostache. 
5. Find something to give Luigi for his muostache. 
6. Visit the gypsy fortune teller. 
 
Problem: Madame Zarmooska is certainly an appealing woman. What do I do 
in her wagon? 
1. Do what you should always do with a woman. Look at her lips. 
2. Kiss the Madame. 
3. Look at the candle. 
4. Try to take the candle. 
5. Take the wax. (Hey now that's something to make your hair stand on end!) 
6. Careful, that's not all you need before you leave. You've only begun 
to touch the problem. (Hint, hint, hint.) 
7. Do lizards really feel like handbags? Or more like raw liver? 
8. Touch/feel/pet the lizard. 
 
Problem: I'd like to take Helmut Bean with me. It might be comforting to 
have another tiny, amusing little guy in my pocket. But how do I get 
him to join the search? 
1. Ask Luigi about Helmut. 
2. Ask Helmut about Helmut. What does this little guy need? 
3. Go back to the lobby of WILL. 
4. Look at the guard. The man's clearly mired in an inner experience 
so Freudian, his id is throbbing. 
5. Wake the guard. What does he say? 
6. Leave and come back when guard is sleeping again. Now you can take 
what you need. 
7. For a few yuks, look at the dream. 
8. Take the dream. 
 
Problem: I think I have everything I need from Col. Bob's travelling circus 
and New York. What now? 
1. Go back in front of the Big Top tent and "look." 
2. Look at the man. 
3. Talk to the man. 
4. Walk up onto the Test-O-Strength. 
 
LAS VEGAS. 
 
Problem: Helmut keeps burning up during re-entry to Las Vegas. 
He looks like a charbroiled hot dog. Can this be avoided? 
1. NO! (just kidding. Of course this can be avoided.) 
2. Find another way for Helmut to get to Las Vegas. 
3. How would you send a small parcel to another city? 
4. Mail Helmut. 
 
Problem: The desert is such an interesting place. I've met some really 
fascinating scorpions out here. But I think I'm lost. How do I get out? 
1. Les is no camel. But he has a hump-equivalent. You need to have 
taken it from his office, however. 
2. Maybe you found the thermos way back then. Maybe you took it. 
But did you fill it? 
3. Look at hte water fountain back in the hall outside Les' office. 
 
Problem: Poolside is really fun. Women are paying more attention to 
me than usual. Of course I am a severed head. Is there some way I 
can keep Vito from decapitating me? 
1. Look at the phone in the cabana. 
2. Look at the phone in the hotel lobby. 
3. Ask the hotel desk clerk to page Mr. Fabulous. 
 
Problem: OK, Vito and Mr. Fabulous are occupied. But now I can't get 
Lyla Libido to talk to me. 
1. Sit on the chair, you fool. You're blocking her sun! 
2. After she leaves, look on the table. 
 
Problem: I know that I'm supposed to give Susie the sweat-stained scarf to 
be cleaned, but she insists that it's already clean enough. Should I hit her? 
1. Yes! Hit her until she cooperates. 
2. No Les, Dont hit her. That would be misogyny. 
3. We knew you'd know what you think you know. (we designed it that way.) 
But you know, There's something else at the cleaners. 
4. Maybe you need a receipt for some other garment. Maybe one left long ago. 
5. Find a receipt somewhere in the hotel and come back. 
6. (Now we both know) 
 
Problem: I've tried everything with the desk clerk, But I still can't get 
a room at the hotel. Should Ileave? 
1. Hey, what would Woodward and Bernstein do? 
2. Go upstairs anyway. 
 
Problem: That skeleton key on the maid's cart could be useful, but oddly 
enough, she won't let me take it. 
1. Find a way to distract the maid. 
2. Sit on the bed. 
3. Smart move, Les. Except the rumpled bed ploy isn't working. Why won't the 
maid come in the room? 
4. What usually keeps maids out of hotel rooms? 
5. Look at the door. 
6. Take the sign. 
7. Reverse the sign. 
Take the keys while the maid is busy making the bed. 
 
Problem: That key worked wonders. But now that I'm in Mr. Fabulous' suite, 
what do I do? 
1. This used to be the King's suite. Chances are you'll find scraps of 
his life here and there. 
2. Look in the hot tub. 
3. Look in the drain. 
4. What do you have that is small enough to fit in the drain? 
 
Problem: I can't get Helmut back out of the drain. I could go sift through 
tons of sludge at the Las Vegas Municipal Waste Treatment Plant, which 
would be fun, but isn't there an easier way to retrieve the little guy? 
1. Les, you didn't just drop him in did you? 
2. You probably need to secure Helmut with a tiny rope-like substance. 
3. Go back to the "typical room" downstairs. 
4. Look in the bathroom. 
5. Look in the sink. 
 
Problem: I've had a great time in Las Vegas. Now what? 
1. Hit the road. We hear the American South is lovely this time of year. 
2. Go back outside the front of the hotel. 
3. Type "look." 
4. Do we need to draw you a THUMBnail scetch, Les? 
5. Hitchhike. 
 
THE KINGDOM 
 
Problem: I tried yelling, hitting, and making scary monster noises, 
but I can't get the Kingdom gates open. What can I do? 
1. Those cranky gates! I guess you need some sort of entrance-gaining 
documentation. 
2. You need a pass, Les. 
3. Local establisments have been known to sponsor contests in which people 
like yourself debase themselves for prizes. 
4. Find Red's Bar. 
 
Problem: Where is Red's Bar? 
1. Just keep wandering around the map of the Kingdom. It's on there. 
Trust us. 
 
Problem: How do I get into Red's? 
1. Obviously, you need to impersonate a celebrity. 
2. You already resemble Pee Wee Herman, but this crowd's looking for 
something different. Try someone closer to their heart. 
3. The King! Impersonate the King! 
4. Wear the suit. 
5. Where would Clark Kent change his clothes? 
 
Problem: I got into Red's. How do I get off the stage? 
1. Great impersonation, Les. But the King often did more on stage than 
stand there, mooning like an idiot. 
2. Dance. 
 
Problem: Geez, I boogied, I got down, I got my mojo going, but I still lost the contest. How can I do better? 
1. You need to "fill out" that jumpsuit in a more Kingly fashion. 
2. It might help to eat something. 
3. Make a sandwich. 
4. You know, it always helps to have ingredients. 
5. You'll find a couple of crucial ingredients in the mansion. 
 
Problem: I enjoyed my tour of the dining room, but I can't get into the 
kitchen from here. 
1. Did you look upstairs yet? 
2. Look at everything in the King's bedroom. 
3. Look IN everything in the bedroom. 
4. Look inside the bureau. 
 
Problem: I've always been pretty good at gripping and sliding down slick pole.But now that I'm in the kitchen, how do I stop spinning? 
1. I'm afraid you'll have to release the pole. 
 
Problem: What an impressive kitchen. I've explored it and found some really interesting stains. But what else can I do in here? 
1. Kitchens are generally for preparing food. 
2. Here's where you make your sandwich, Les. 
3. Remember that jar of peanut butter you found in the lunchbag you took from the drawer in your office? Way back at WILL? 
4. You also need a banana. 
5. Have you looted the dining room yet? 
6. You've pilfered the banana. Now you need white spongy food substance to hold all the ingredients together. 
7. Check behind the kitchen counter. 
8. Of course, it helps to open the counter first. 
 
Problem: Now that I cut a more Kingly figure, how do I get back into Red's? 
1. Have you toured the awards room yet? 
2. A musical instrument would greatly enhance your act. 
3. Your audience might also appreciate a sound-amplification device, since your natural voice sounds like some sort of small woodlands animal. 
 
Problem: Despite ugly threats, the guitar still won't let me take it. Can I start sobbing now? 
1. No, Les. Deactivate the alarm. 
2. Go back to the foyer. 
3. Carefully examine everything in the foyer. 
4. Look inside everything in the foyer. 
5. Look inside the bears mouth. 
6. You need a little friend again, don't you? 
 
Problem: Hey! I have everything I need, but I'm still not getting into Red's. 
1. Stop whining and look at the guitar. 
2. Fix the guitar. 
3. Did you forget to take something out of the Las Vegas hot tub drain? 
 
Problem: I returned into Red's Bar, danced again, got trampled, and died. Is this the end? 
1. No, Les. You died and went to heaven - an OK place, I guess, except it sort of resembles an immense theme park. Too bad you don't have a resurrection card. 
2. Go visit Madame Zarmooska. 
3. Examine the lizard. 
4. Try taking the lizard. 
5. Try moving the lizard. 
6. Take the card from the lizard's mouth. 
 