        Well, hello ladies and jerks.  It's time for Mist Hunter's all new
advice column....


                          DR. KNOWLEDGABLE
 DK:>Let's take a caller... Hello, your talking to Dr. Knowledgable.  What's
 the glitch?
 RM:>Uh, hi.  It's Radman.
 DK:>Whaddya need lamer?
 RM:>Well, I think that I have a sort of image problem.
 DK:>You cmae up with that one by yourself?
 RM:>Well, I think that people think that I take to much credit for ACID.
 DK:>Weel, you don't do to mu...  Yeah, they think that.
 RM:>Well, I mean, c'mon, I'm the one that keeps all the group together!  Who
 collects the pack material?  ME!  Not Lord Jazz or Halster; me!!!!!  Any
 advice?
 DK:> <snore>  Ohh, umm, yes, I have some advice.  You need to go outside and
 take a real good look at things.  You should realize that there are other
 people in.....<click>Hello?  Hello?
 NO CARRIER
 <hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm.....>
 DK:>How about another caller?  Hello, Heartbreak, what up?
 HB:>I'm having problems with my, well, my...you know...uhhh...unit<click>
 NO CARRIER
 DK:>Next caller...  What's the deal Ln?
 LN:>It's with Rhett.
 DK:>Is he afraid to talk about his problem?
 LN:>Yes, he can't even admit that he has a problem.
 DK:>Well, you tell me what it is and you can then get Rhett on the phone.
 LN:>Well, he keeps leaving sores around my...<click>(NO CARRIER)
 DK:>Isn't someone screening these callers?  What's that?  The screeeneer
 commited suicide?  {Yeah, that's right}  Whaddya expect in a therapists
 office...  Next caller; who is this?
 B5:>Yeah, this is the Black Snowman..
 DK:>Let me put you...hee hee... on ho...hee hee... hold.
 B5:>Okay.<click>
 DK:>Hahahahahahahahahaha!  Someone get the tape recorder running!  {Why?}
 Cuz we got the Black Snowman on!  Big time rip artist.<click>
 DK:>Go ahead with your problem; I'm listening...hee.
 B5:>Well, uhh, this is all confidential, right?
 DK:>{We got the tape}  UHHHH...........  YES IT IS!
 B5:>Well, I kind of have a problem with ripping ansi.
 DK:>We kind of caught on to that one.
 B5:>I mean my ansi sucks real bad so I try to compensate.
 DK:>Is there anything that you could be compensating for?  Childhood probs?
 Dating stress?
 B5:>Well... There was that one time when I was over in Europe and I was
 checking out Paris.
 DK:>What about it?
 B5:>I ordered a hooker and it turned out to be a guy.
 DK:>HAHAHAHuuuuuummmmm, go ahead, I had to make a mental note.
 B5:>I went through with it.
 DK:>You fucking homo!  Get the ....  continue ..hee hee... please.
 B5:>Then there was the time that LN and I got together and....<CLICK>
 NO CARRIER
        Well that is all the time that we have for this week.  Next time we
 should be sporting Boba Fett, the operator of the guy that runs Acidic and
 maybe even a special mystery caller.  Once again I came through with more
 great lit.  Tell Bf that you guys want a li. dept. with Mist Hunter in
 control!!
SAUCE00Dr. Knowledgeable                  Crimethink          READ THE INI FILE   19970129  P                              