XPost: alt.fan.states.new-york, alt.cities.new-york, nyc.announce 
 XPost: nyc.market.housing 
 From: glmiller@N0SPAM.0RG 
  
 The Politically Correct Leftwing Liberal Handbook 
  
 1. You have to believe that the AIDS virus is spread by a lack of 
 federal funding. 
  
 2. You have to believe that the same teacher who can't teach 4th 
 graders how to read is somehow qualified to teach those same kids 
 about sex. 
  
 3. You have to believe that guns in the hands of law-abiding Americans 
 are more of a threat than U.S. nuclear weapons technology in the hands 
 of Chinese and North Korean communists. 
  
 4. You have to believe that there was no art before Federal funding. 
  
 5. You have to believe that global temperatures are less affected by 
 cyclical, documented changes in the earth's climate, and more affected 
 by soccer moms driving SUVs. 
  
 6. You have to believe that gender roles are artificial, but being 
 homosexual is natural. 
  
 7. You have to be against capital punishment for criminals, even 
 murderers, but support abortion on demand. 
  
 8. You have to believe that businesses create oppression, and 
 governments create prosperity. 
  
 9. You have to believe that hunters don't care about nature, but loony 
 activists who have never been outside of San Francisco do. 
  
 10. You have to believe that self-esteem is more important than 
 actually doing something to earn it. 
  
 11. You have to believe that the military, not politicians, start 
 wars. 
  
 12. You have to believe the NRA is bad, because it supports certain 
 parts of the Constitution, while the ACLU is good because it supports 
 certain parts of the Constitution. 
  
 13. You have to believe that taxes are too low, but ATM fees are too 
 high. 
  
 14. You have to believe that Margaret Sanger and Gloria Steinem are 
 more important to American history than Thomas Jefferson, Gen. Robert 
 E.Lee and Thomas Edison. 
  
 15. You have to believe that standardized tests are racist, but racial 
 quotas and set-asides are not. 
  
 16. You have to believe that Hillary Clinton is normal, and really a 
 very nice person. 
  
 17. You have to believe that the only reason socialism hasn't worked 
 anywhere it's been tried, is because the right people haven't been in 
 charge. 
  
 18. You have to believe conservatives telling the truth belong in 
 jail, but a draft-dodging liar and sex offender belonged in the White 
 House. 
  
 19. You have to believe that homosexual parades displaying drag, 
 transvestites and bestiality should be constitutionally protected, and 
 manger scenes at Christmas should be illegal. 
  
 20. You have to believe that illegal Democratic Party funding by the 
 Chinese government is somehow in the best interests of the United 
 States. 
  
 21. You have to refuse to discuss the issues in a rational manner and 
 whenever someone attempts to do so, throw a 3 ring tantrum, rant and 
 rave, go into a lunatic rage and outshout them (preferably with 
 profanity and name-calling) and stick to personal slurs, smear 
 tactics, slander and building strawmen so you can knock down the 
 strawmen (oops, sorry, strawpersons) and hopefully sidetrack the 
 conversation away from your lack of ability to support your position. 
  
 22. You must always ignore the message and attack the messenger. When 
 stuck, remember the tactic that won't reveal your inability to think 
 or say anything original: smugly change a couple of your adversaries 
 words' and repeat their comments back to them verbatim and even if it 
 isn't true, by all means always be sure to accuse your opponents of 
 using the very tactics the Leftwing Liberals try to hide, remembering 
 all the while that Lenin would be proud. 
  
 23. No matter how credible a source may be - always do your Leftwing 
 Liberal duty and rabidly claim it's been debunked and discredited and 
 call anyone who believes it "mean spirited", crazy, a Nazi or any 
 other of the monikers from the Leftwing Liberal grab bag of infantile 
 epithets and sarcastic sobriquets. 
  
 24. Whenever demonstrated facts don't agree with your agenda, twist 
 them and mangle them until you can make them fit into your prejudices, 
 the media will assist you greatly. 
  
 25. Once you've told a lie or slandered someone, be sure to repeat it 
 as often as possible until it becomes true. "Members and front 
 organizations must continually embarrass, discredit and degrade our 
 critics. When obstructionists become too irritating, label them as 
 fascist, or Nazi or anti-Semitic .... The association will, after 
 enough repetition, become "fact" in the public mind." [ ~ Communist 
 Party, Moscow Central Committee, 1943] 
  
 26. You have to believe that all spirituality and all religions except 
 Islam are bad. 
  
 27. You have to use the following buzzwords as often as possible: 
 "Nazi", "Hitler", "Gestapo", "police state", "totalitarian state", 
 "imperialism", "imperialist", "greedy corporations", "shrub", 
 "fascist", "paranoid", "goose-stepping", "ruling-class", 
 "class-strife", "class warfare", "stolen election", "racist", 
 "entitlements", "hate", "bourgeois" or better yet, "petty bourgeois", 
 "counter-revolutionary", "progressive", "red-baiter", 
 "anti-Communist", "deviationist", "revisionist", "reactionary", 
 "multiculturalism", "oppressed", "victims of Yankee oppression", 
 "plight of the [fill in the blank] people", "mean-spirited", 
 "McCarthyism", "jingoism", "flag-wavers", "neocons" and, of course, 
 overuse of the indispensable "F" 
 word. 
  
 28. You have to believe that there were never any weapons of mass 
 destruction in Iraq, even though they were used against Iran, the 
 Kurds and the the Iraqi people and even though the many Democrats 
 warned us about WMD before the Iraqi invasion: William Jefferson 
 Clinton, Hillary Clinton, Sandy Berger, Madeline Albright, Senators 
 Carl Levin, Tom Daschle, Robert Byrd, Jay Rockefeller, John Kerry, Bob 
 Graham, Ted Kennedy, Representatives Nancy Pelosi and Henry Waxman and 
 vice-president Al Gore to name only the most vociferous. 
  
 29. You have to be a purveyor of perennial pessimism and a dispatcher 
 of doomsday gloom and hyperbolic hysteria whenever you can work some 
 scare tactics into the foreboding warnings of eventual catastrophe at 
 the hands of your adversaries, i.e. people who disagree with you. 
  
 30. Whenever possible, if you hear or read something that seems quite 
 logical and might influence someone against the Leftwing Liberal 
 viewpoint, be sure to pounce on the exception or some tiny, 
 inconsequential irrelevancy, such as the misspelling, poor punctuation 
 or mispronunciation of a word, unusual facial expression, article of 
 clothing or some morsel of arcane trivia or irrelevant minutia in an 
  
 [continued in next message] 
  
 --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05 
  * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2)