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  Msg # 253 of 32001 on ZZNY4436, Thursday 9-28-22, 11:28  
  From: STARWARS  
  To: ALL  
  Subj: How to Irritate the IRS  
 XPost: alt.california, la.general, pa.general 
 XPost: soc.culture.israel 
 From: nobody@tatooine.homelinux.net 
  
 How to Irritate the IRS 
  
 1. Always put extra paper clips on your forms. Any foreign fasteners 
 or the like have to be removed and put away. 
  
 2. Always put staples in the right hand corner. Go ahead and put them 
 down the whole right side. The extractors who remove the mail from 
 the envelopes have to take out any staples on the right side. 
  
 3. If you send two checks, they'll have to staple your unsightly 
 envelope to your half destroyed form. 
  
 4. If you're very unfortunate and have to pay taxes, send two or 
 three party check. On top of paying with a third party check, pay one 
 of the dollars you owe in cash. When an extractor receives cash, no 
 matter how small an amount, he has to take it to a special desk and 
 fill out of few nasty forms. 
  
 5. Line the bottom of your envelope with Elmer's glue and let it dry 
 before you put in you forms, so that the automated opener doesn't 
 open it and the extractor has to open it by hand. 
  
 6. Never arrange paperwork in the right order, or even facing the 
 right way. Put a few upside down and backwards. That way they have to 
 remove all your staples, rearrange your paperwork and re-staple it 
 (on the left side). 
  
 7. Sign your name in ink on every page. Any signature has to be 
 verified and then date stamped. These are just a few of the fun and 
 exciting things you can do with the IRS. These methods are ONLY 
 recommended when you OWE money. 
  
 8. When you mail it, mail it in a big envelope (even if its just a 
 single EZ form). Big envelopes have to be torn and sorted differently 
 than regular business size ones. An added bonus to the big envelope 
 is that they take priority over other mail, so the workers can hurry 
 up and deal with your mess. 
  
 9. Write a little letter of appreciation. Any letter received has to 
 be read and stamped regardless of what it is or what it's on. 
  
 10. Write your letter on something misshapen and unconventional. Like 
 on the back of a supermarket sack. 
  
 11. If they owe you money, being nice helps. 
  
 --- SoupGate-Win32 v1.05 
  * Origin: you cannot sedate... all the things you hate (1:229/2) 

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